| (no subject) |
[Apr. 22nd, 2007|06:10 pm] |
25th of Autumn, Half Solar, 50th year of Homura
It has been three days that I've been here in the South Pole in Fort Shu Wei.
It is very cold.
There is a lot of ice.
Everywhere.
It is the months of all-night sun, so we are protected during this time. The army is trying to finish the settlement now before the months of non-ending night.
The encampment is a fortress, somewhat bustling, but most of the people who've been here for a while only wish to be back home, though they serve our country well and with bravery.
I have not yet seen any Watertribe people.
I hear a lot a stories about how they'll come in a couple days to trade, though some are still suspicious of them for some reason.
There are some children here. Mostly daughters and sons of Firenation military officials sent to join their parents in the campaign.
Most come from prestigious families or legendary bloodlines, and some of the children (some who are even a bit younger than me) even take up advanced training in the camp.
I could have joined in the training with the other children at my age here. But my training level is so slow...I had to delay it. Though father is still kind and patient with me, helping with basic sets everyday as much as he can..even if he is busy.
I'm not that much sad these days, I try to keep my thoughts occupied with walking, training and writing, I even try to play some flute. Though some of my own insecurities have not seemed to change..
One girl here named Ribari, who is about my age; hails from the central Firenation. She hails neither from a prestigious family or lineage. Her skills are rough at most, self taught, BUT she has so much determination and makes so much use of what she has, and trains so hard whenever she can. I've never even seen such wit and quickness from anyone that I've seen, not even from Peng-peng or the others back home.
What I like about her the most is that she never takes herself too seriously, she always tells the most funny jokes, and keeps her vision of how things are, real. She is friendly with me, and I enjoy walking and talking with her on the grounds.
She says I have such talent in sustaining flame and playing the flute.
Her fluteplaying is also something to be quite admired.
I like her a lot.
...I admit I am a bit jealous and wish I was more like her.
But I cannot.
For I am myself. Nothing more.
And right now that doesn't seem to mean much to anyone else, not even to me. |
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| Memories of Warmth |
[Nov. 23rd, 2006|01:15 am] |
19th of Autumn, Half Solar, 50th year of Homura
We are three days away from Fort Shu Wei.
Father says it is a good solid base with many soldiers, but also a place where a couple other children of firenation officers have set up nearby within the base called "Camp Yu Xin".
He also says it is a good chance for me to further some of my training, that while he supervises his men there, he will still be able to see me now that I am close,... and if I'm lucky will be able to see some of the ...Water tribe people themselves when they come to trade every week.
Father says they are a good people and will be fair and generous, despite the incidents that happened a few years ago in their land... I'm not sure of it, but Father also says that hopefully the FireNation encampments there would actually aid the struggle rather than make it worse.
hmm...
I asked him:
"Will it be cold there as it is right now?"
"Colder, but you will get used to it, I will help you to, my daughter"
"Is it true that the sun stays in the sky the entire day for some nights? and that the Sun disappears for months and never comes out?"
"Yes, fortunately we've been there and toughed it out during the dark months, re-supplied and organized our forces during the recent light months, and will be prepared for future dark months ahead."
"..I'm afraid, Father."
"..Don't be, my daughter. I will help you become strong. And I will keep you safe, I promise."
"...I'm glad."
"So am I"
"But...I miss home. ...I miss the Firenation...I miss my old friends...and Grandma..."
"I know you do, Rei...but you know that's something that cannot be helped right now."
"Yes Father, but.."
"They will always remain inside you, memories of warmth. When you think of them, they will warm you even in the coldest night, like the rays of the sun. It is a warmth that never leaves."
I close my eyes...I think I feel that warmth.
and see the memories...like the warmth of the sun.
 |
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| Ship Log 3 |
[Aug. 29th, 2006|11:06 pm] |
9th of Autumn, 3rd half solar day, 50th year of Homura
There are days, when I feel "fine" but feeling "fine" doesn't really bring any real meaning or emotion.
( And there are other days... ) |
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| Ship Log: 2 |
[Jul. 21st, 2006|05:19 am] |
9th of Autumn, 1st half Solar Day, 50th year of Homura
Days are getting colder and colder.
( Read more... ) |
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| Too Many things have changed... |
[Apr. 17th, 2006|11:05 pm] |
8th of Autumn, 9th full Solar Day, 50th year of Homura
Ship log one:
Grandmother once said that things in this world, good or bad, always happen for a reason.
If that's true, then I wonder what the reason is why this has happened.
I'm not even sure I want to know
( I feel numb ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 16th, 2006|08:59 pm] |
I can't breathe.
I don't believe it.
Am I being punished?
Is that why she's being taken away?
Why?
Am I being punished?
What now? What now?
what now? |
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| Satomi |
[Feb. 25th, 2006|12:42 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  happy | ] |
4th of the Summer, 1st half Solar Day, 50th year of Homura
Today was...surprisingly pleasant.
It didn't start out too pleasant though.
At training, we had to practice double endurance sets again.
All of us had our partners spot us on how many complete sets we could do.
I got paired up with Satomi, the new girl.
A cheery person who I was able to befriend right away.
So anyway, all us girls did our sets.
Peng-peng was amazing, she did 40 whole sets in under 30 seconds.
Chise, who isn't even that strong, did 30 complete sets.
In fact, everyone was able to complete about 30 or over 30 sets.
But me
...
It was horrible, I did only 8
That's right 8.
8
8
8
8
Fortunately for my the life of me, Master Zaimi wasn't watching at all, but when she asked Satomi how many I was able to do, I just about turned red all over, all the other girls giggled and laughed, and at that moment I felt sick like I was going to die.
That's when it happened.
Satomi told Master: "Um...she did 15"
Master Zaimi still scolded me for not being able to endure as much as I was supposed to, but as I looked onto Satomi's face, she gave me a quiet, kind smile.
Satomi saved me.
...even if she had to lie...she still saved me.
It feels good to have someone, even if it's just only one friend, to look out for you. |
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| A Sad Beautiful Song |
[Feb. 10th, 2006|01:59 am] |
2nd of the Summer, 6th full Solar Day, 50th year of Homura
Dear Diary,
I got sick a couple days ago, fever perhaps.
I was sweating buckets, and then everything went blurry and I fell down.
Kind grandmother, she tucked me in and put a damp cloth on me, I was so dizzy that I couldn’t keep my eyes open. She spoonfed me some hot broth to ease some food into my painful stomach.
Then, she sang to me the song mother used to sing.
It was the sad, beautiful one about the glowing fireflies in the field.
And without knowing why, even if I was sickly and my ears could barely make out her voice, her melody cut so deep inside of me…
I began to cry.
I was not even sure why I was crying.
Later, I became well again, and had to catch up when I went to train again with the others, because of the days I had spent getting well.
I lagged even further behind.
Master Zaimi looked disapprovingly upon me when she had seen how little progress I had been making and gave me a harsh lecture in front of our entire group.
I was red with embarrassment and bowed my head low for her, but she didn’t know I was closing my eyes.
I tried not to let everyone’s glaring stares and my master’s hard words cut into me, so instead I tried to think of the grandmother’s gentle song.
-Rei |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 8th, 2006|03:41 pm] |
1st of the Summer, 4th Half Solar Day, 50th year of Homura
Dear Diary,
I feel light headed right now. Maybe it’s the heat, but I do not think that is why.
It’s like I don’t know where I am, or where I’m going, or what in the world is going to happen.
Not like everyone else, who seem like they’re going for what they want and working for it.
Chise is going to become a doctor, she’s already apprenticing under her aunt who works at the clinic up town. She’s patient, has a good memory, and skillful hands. Physician Goru has also given her full use of his facilities when he saw what she was capable of. I have no doubt that she’ll do well. She is a genius.
Peng-peng, who is nearly two months younger than I am, is getting even stronger and more determined to become the best student of Master Zaimi. She wakes up before dawn just to finish her chores early and runs to the training grounds to practice her sets. The other day, when we were on a expository trip to the boys’ brigade, she was able to take down Pupil Yuji, who they said, was one of the strongest and fiercest students of Master Wuo.
Not like me, I’m very weak in comparison.
Narita, who is sixteen, and is very fair and beautiful and dresses herself in the most beautiful of rose deep gowns has just been wed to Tatsu, a fine soldier in the army who comes from a distinguished lineage of honored generals. Narita has managed to finally bring her family’s name some amount of dignity, she is so happy and proud now, she tells me. She loves Tatsu so much, and she promises to look after and guard his household well, while he is fulfilling his service.
But me? What am I doing?
I am basically doing nothing. It will be only one more year until I turn twelve, and I haven’t even gotten ready for advanced training like the others in the brigade.
This will be the third time this month that I have skipped weekly sparring matches.
I ran away again and hid in the thicket next to the river and played my flute until I got tired and fell asleep
I am lazy.
I went home and lied to Grandmother that I had gone to the match and finished by then.
But I’m a terrible liar. Grandmother could tell I wasn’t telling the truth, but she didn’t say anything and merely smiled and just told me to sit down and have some of the spicy soup she made for me.
I hate myself.
-Rei |
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mimi_no_asahi's journal
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